Human Beings

Associate and participate or Dissociate for perspective using NLP
Chapter 5
p.5
Dissociation and Association? Sounds terribly complicated to me! What is it and how can it help me to improve my interaction with colleagues and customers?
Dissociation and Association are two NLP techniques and are closely related to the Johari Window – The Glad Game.
Dissociation means literally to disconnect, create some distance, to gain perspective, to see situations and yourself in perspective.
Association means to connect closely, to participate in the here and now. In dealing with any external stimulus, like a problem, you can choose whether you want to Associate or Dissociate.
You can even shift from one to the other to gain a more complete understanding and insight. Unfortunately, many people operate in either the one or the other mode …
Mike Matulovich’s’ explanation of “seeing yourself in the picture vs. seeing yourself in the situation” should make it even clearer.
Thank you to: Mike Matulovich
Dissociation (Disconnect)
See yourself in the picture
(become aware of yourself).
Observer of yourself.
Talk to yourself about the situation.
How do you feel about your feelings.
Did you know?
Human beings are the only animal species that can dissociate.
Dissociation is useful for:
Dealing with conflict.
(It allows you to have better control of the situation and enables you to ask questions in an objective manner and tone).
Monitoring yourself. (Stand apart from yourself.)
See yourself from outside yourself. (See yourself through the eyes of someone else. Step outside of yourself to manage conflict.)
Enabling you to:
Feel pain
Remain in control
Feel no emotion which obscures judgment
Learn from negative experiences
Build resourcefulness
Design desired states
Association (Connect)
See now what you see.
Participate in the event.
Hear now what you hear.
Feel now what you experience.
Did you know?
Association is the state we live in – the subjective experience.
Association is useful for:
Enjoying yourself (Associate with happiness, success, feelings of love and joy – live for the moment.)
Empowering yourself with successes.
Utilizing positive experiences.
(When tackling a problem draw from past successes – think of all the thousands of problems you have already solved.)
Accessing resourcefulness.
Accessing past positive states.
Writing down a problem immediately dissociates one from it.
One should associate with success and happiness, and utilize success to deal with problems.

Associate and Participate or Dissociate for Perspective using NLP

Chapter 5 p.5

w&t_question

I Ask

Dissociation and Association? Sounds terribly complicated to me! What is it and how can it help me to improve my interaction with colleagues and customers?

w&t_exclamation

I Answer

Dissociation and Association are two NLP techniques and are closely related to the Johari Window – The Glad Game.

Dissociation means literally to disconnect, create some distance, to gain perspective, to see situations and yourself in perspective.

Association means to connect closely, to participate in the here and now. In dealing with any external stimulus, like a problem, you can choose whether you want to Associate or Dissociate.

You can even shift from one to the other to gain a more complete understanding and insight. Unfortunately, many people operate in either the one or the other mode …

w&t_binoculars

I Explain

Mike Matulovich’s’ explanation of “seeing yourself in the picture vs. seeing yourself in the situation” should make it even clearer.

w&t_ch5_f_association-and-dissociation

Thank you to: Mike Matulovich

Dissociation (Disconnect)

  • See yourself in the picture
    (become aware of yourself).
  • Observer of yourself.
  • Talk to yourself about the situation.
  • How do you feel about your feelings.

Did you know?

Human beings are the only animal species that can dissociate.

Dissociation is useful for:

  • Dealing with conflict.
    (It allows you to have better control of the situation and enables you to ask questions in an objective manner and tone).
  • Monitoring yourself. (Stand apart from yourself.)
  • See yourself from outside yourself. (See yourself through the eyes of someone else. Step outside of yourself to manage conflict.)
  • Enabling you to:
    • Feel pain
    • Remain in control
    • Feel no emotion which obscures judgment
    • Learn from negative experiences
    • Build resourcefulness
    • Design desired states

Association (Connect)

  • See now what you see.
  • Participate in the event.
  • Hear now what you hear.
  • Feel now what you experience.

Did you know?

Association is the state we live in – the subjective experience.

Association is useful for:

  • Enjoying yourself (Associate with happiness, success, feelings of love and joy – live for the moment.)
  • Empowering yourself with successes.
  • Utilizing positive experiences.
    (When tackling a problem draw from past successes – think of all the thousands of problems you have already solved.)
  • Accessing resourcefulness.
  • Accessing past positive states.Writing down a problem immediately dissociates one from it.
w&t_elephant

I Advise

One should associate with success and happiness, and utilize success to deal with problems.

Goal clarification is a continuous process
Chapter 7 p.3
I become so frustrated! Every time I am about to reach my goal the goal posts are shifted! I try to plot the straightest path to reach my goal but it feels like I am meandering all over the show.
It very seldom happens that we steer directly towards our goals, like an arrow on its way to its target. Remember that if human beings don’t have goals, they will not achieve all they could achieve, but…
The method in which we strive towards our goals is always a meandering path.
The fact that the environment is constantly changing calls for agility in reaching goals.
Upon reaching certain goals we have to move on to realizing new goals to avoid life losing its challenge.
Maxwell’s journey of life illustrates to us the fact that we are engaged in a continuous goal clarification process and that we can expect to find both frustration and joy in meandering towards our goals.
Continuous goal clarification is an integral part of managing your career as well setting your KRA’s.

Goal clarification is a continuous process

Chapter 7 p.3

w&t_question

I Ask

I become so frustrated! Every time I am about to reach my goal the goal posts are shifted! I try to plot the straightest path to reach my goal but it feels like I am meandering all over the show.

w&t_exclamation

I Answer

It very seldom happens that we steer directly towards our goals, like an arrow on its way to its target. Remember that if human beings don’t have goals, they will not achieve all they could achieve, but…

The method in which we strive towards our goals is always a meandering path.

The fact that the environment is constantly changing calls for agility in reaching goals.

Upon reaching certain goals we have to move on to realizing new goals to avoid life losing its challenge.

w&t_binoculars

I Explain

Maxwell’s journey of life illustrates to us the fact that we are engaged in a continuous goal clarification process and that we can expect to find both frustration and joy in meandering towards our goals.

w&t_ch7_c_the_need_for_continuous_goal_clarification

w&t_elephant

I Advise

Continuous goal clarification is an integral part of managing your career as well setting your KRA’s.