Benefit

Are you one of those lucky people that have too many job opportunities? For your career to thrive you need to make the right job choice. Let master career coach, Unre Visagie, show you how to make the right job choice.

Slide 1 (The solution to grab new exciting challenges of your choice)

We are looking at people that say, they have too many choices, and how do they choose? When we all work and invest together for the benefit of everybody, we will get more benefits. The key thing is to do first for others. When making these choices in your own best interest there is a solution where you can look at the exciting challenges and the great returns you can have from making your choices. You have to know what you currently do for whom. Why did you get into the position where you have all these choices?

You prepare and communicate to influencers. You engage and communicate the work that you enjoy doing and that is valued. Recently, with John, who had a fantastic position, it was very clear that if he keeps on doing the same he will have less than he can have. Referring back to Einstein’s old saying that if you keep on doing the same thing expecting different results it may be close to insanity. It is something to keep in mind.

Slide 2 (Know what you currently do for whom)

Let’s look at people who have too many choices and have the perception that it’s difficult to exercise just one choice and lose the others. When you make the right choice it becomes clear that there’s no doubt. You don’t have any feeling of loss, you move from those perceptions, because they are just perceptions, to the great spaces where you know exactly why you’ve made the choice and what you expect back. You can communicate clarity to everyone around you.

You have to know what you currently do for whom. Why is it so valuable that you have all these choices? Let’s look at simple ways to understand and discuss what you say no to and what you say yes to. That is where a man with a plan has all the benefits. ‘No’ is probably one of the more profitable words in the English language, as mentioned by Jack Welsh. When I sat with John and said, “Ok, let’s look at what you say no to” it was great stress because he didn’t want to say no to anything. What do you say yes to? What are the consequences when you say yes to certain things? Yes often means a three year commitment and where are you going to be in three years? You can never quite control it but at least you can make the best choice with your current insight.

Slide 3 (Prepare to communicate to the influencers)

Let’s look at those choices. When moving from the perceived boxes to the great spaces you have to prepare to communicate to the influencers.  How do you prepare? You discuss it with people around you. You can start right now. It’s amazing what the people around you know. When John discussed it with people around him, including some of his clients in big mining companies and clients in big IT companies they collaborated with, he was amazed to find that his choices were even more than he was aware. However, they also helped him to understand the future of the industry, the future of the consequences of his choices with much greater clarity, factual and grounded in reality. When John practiced, he could approach the company he wanted, that didn’t even have a job at that time. He should have the job shortly, in January or February.

Slide 4 (Engage and communicate)

Lastly, John engaged with his clear, prepared stories. A man with a plan is welcome everywhere, a man without a plan people usually  leave alone to figure himself out, they’re just kind to you, it’s not as rude as some people think. He approached companies with his clear, practised plan and showed respect and acknowledgement to the people he recognized as leaders in the broad industry, whom he could see was on the fast track. Why are they on the fast track? Learn from them. They guided him and introduced him to the right people that can give him the job. It’s a very straightforward process but people need that clarity.

Slide 5 (Start with the purpose, the why)

You need clarity of purpose, with objectives and tasks, dynamically calibrated with your own long-term career vision and mission. This helps you to align with the company’s long-term vision and you’re seen as a strategic contributor, which further puts you up the ladder. We find this is a very important process, like in John’s case, he really couldn’t answer this three months ago, now he can tell you in one minute.

Slide 6 (The right change thinking discussion)

This is the second tool amongst the list of templates we use that you can re-use with your friends, because they are free on the web. There are rules in every company, every industry, every client environment; every team has its subculture of rules. Understand those rules, influence them perhaps slowly, but don’t waste your time fighting and being angry. John was very unhappy with his current company because he could see he contributed more, but their compensation structure didn’t allow for him to earn more, so their rules made John earn less.

It turns out that he can influence the rules, we prepared him to influence the rules in the meantime, to say that I am experiencing stress, but show that I care, show that I respect, how do we go forward? He then proceeded anyway, without the rules being changed, he didn’t waste time, he played where he can make decisions. He played where he has influence and it’s known, he started contributing more and communicating better. He’s moving his line to where more becomes known to him, so his space for production grows and he’s now very much a strategic player. That is the other alternative, where his current company may treat him in a way where it will not be practical for him to leave. At least he has all these choices.

Slide 7 (The approach to engage people should be)

Let’s look at a simple way that you can use right now. John identified the people that he admired and why he admired them, he went to them with clear respect, recognition and acceptance. All of us love respect, recognition and acceptance. One of my favourite professors always said: “Applause, applause, anything for applause!” Everybody is a sucker for that. Use it, but be genuine, if you go with false thank yous you will have problems. When you have a plan, you’ve done your homework, you’ve talked to people around you, you’ve prepared, then you approach the people with open and closed questions. All of this detail is available free on the website; use it. The reason we made it free is that you need these tools to talk to people around you, it’s critical that you can freely engage the people around you. They can also watch the videos and do it free. We come into the game when we can accelerate you and add extra value. Let’s look at the website quickly. There are specific, measurable, accountable resources, time and rewards.

Slide 8 (careerdevelopmentplan.net)

When you look at the website, you will see the tools and the resources. We have organized each block of tools on the website to focus on a specific area of a stress or growth opportunity. When you look at your career choices, we go to Career Planning and Performance. To demonstrate the free tools that is available which John also used in his coaching. We’ve bundled them into big, logical groups where you can look at various career level changes, resumes and the smart goal setting, which I want to point out specifically. You must have specific, measurable, accountable resources time and monitor, planning, performance etc. Every aspect is organized into groups like this. When we look at approaching people with open and closed questions, it is part of that group of tools.

Slide 9 (I have too many choices, how do I choose?)

Having too many choices, how do I choose? Let us summarize the whole process. People normally have perceptions of difficulty of choice and the solution is: get more information, talk to more people, get clarity and get rid of any fears and uncertainties. Fear just stands for False Evidence Appearing Real. Fail just stands for First Attempt in Learning. Everything that we have learnt we learnt through trial and sometimes losing some skin in trying to ride a bicycle. It never stops, but as we go higher, we get more concerned about what people will think. We get more worried about coming across as someone who doesn’t know what he’s doing. The process is simple and clear and it avoids most of those risks.

The process is: know what you do, prepare to communicate what you do, engage influencers and communicate to them. I find very few people can tell you their store of assets and their expertise. In John’s case, his top skill is probably that he has a very good interface, people enjoy being around him, that is a core skill for him. He was very uncomfortable to put that in his CV, so we got nice examples, now it’s in his CV. The other thing that he had difficulty with was his golden thread.

The golden thread leading to your key to success is simply where John made decisions in the same direction from a very young age. A service to people, a great curiosity to understand things, that’s what’s been driving him since school days. He never realized that he could put in his CV that he’s been consistent in how he made decisions. He had quite a few job changes, that is why we had to show consistency with the golden thread, this is built into the stories on the site. He had an awesome asset list that only became clear when he talked to clients, colleagues and friends. This caused him some discomfort, but he now has a very powerful story to tell around his CV.

He realized his external resources, the number of people who were prepared to help him and introduce him, introduce him to people who can introduce him, all of that and learning some skills that he now requires knowing where he wants to go. It’s all available, he just had to have a plan and engage. He’s building his own staircase and climbing it, which could be scary, but we explained that fear and risk could be managed.

Start with exploring, preparing, engaging and in the process you will grow like John did. Your job, company and industry must align while growing your asset list. Secondly, you must align your job, work and career. You are continuously in charge of your future; you keep on doing preparation, exploration and engagement. You will always be secure and safe, and a desired employee. You will get huge increases, like John, in a time when nobody around you will get increases. John ended up with insight, knowledge and confidence because he had a plan and a clear story. John moved from the perceived boxes and too many choices and uncertainty to absolute certainty about where he’s going next, how he’s going to use and grow his asset list.

Slide 10 (Business toolset, personal toolset)

Having too many choices and choosing comes to down the business toolset and the personal toolset that I’ve shown you on the website. Please watch out for the next Career Maker System email. I hope you’ve enjoyed it and I hope you will realize the privilege of having too many choices deserve that you go and explore, prepare and engage these choices to get absolute clarity about the one that will work best for you. Thank you for listening.

Work Frustration

We are often frustrated by stupid politics in the workplace. Do you feel like people are backstabbing you and making up all kinds of stories to hurt your reputation? Are the people you work with frustrating the hell out of you? Let master career coach, Unre Visagie guide you through dealing with this unpleasant situation in this coaching video…

Slide 1 (People around here frustrate me)

Careerdevelopmentplan.net offers the foolproof Career Maker System. Today we specifically talk about how people in my workplace and other places could frustrate me from time to time.  In our businesses over the years, coaching, pro bono work at schools and universities, we have found that sometimes people do grind against each other and frustrate each other. How do you use this frustration to your benefit and influence your career decisions positively?

We believe turning frustration into career growth can be an exciting experience. People making career changes using the Career Maker System often got 30% and more increases within 18 months. They took the energy that’s gone into nurturing the frustration and they turned it around to work for them with less effort and a lot more fun. It creates a secure, safe and certain way to change towards your ideal career, and ensure that you earn what you want and what you deserve in the company, the job, the industry of your choice in midlife or after. We hope you enjoy the process and the details we offer you on the website.

Slide 2 (We all work, invest and benefit together)

People often have the awareness that people have is of they, others, that frustrate me. It creates a feeling that the others must change before I can be ok. In this model we turn it around; we let you use the opportunities where you work with others, even in frustration. So you can communicate what you do what you understand, your value, and you then move towards more valuable work for the company and for you. You will see how you grow, by getting rid of the frustrations and turning it into your benefit.

The solution for turning frustration into benefit: know what you currently do for whom, what you are committed to do, what’s part of your job to do and what you can expand to do, there’s a whole lot of opportunities. Prepare this communication with people around you, people you can trust and with whom you are comfortable. With your prepared communication engage anybody where you can deliver value, and especially those that in the past used to frustrate you in your interactions.

Slide 3 (Why would your employer want you to earn more)

Why would your employer be very keen for you to do this and pay you more? Yes, they do want to pay you more, but only if you do much more. That’s the way we’ve all earned more in our lives. In any business there’s shareholders that wants more returns, and if they get more, we get more capital to play with, it’s very simple. It’s easier for the board and the executive management to manage if we make an input strategically, if we add value, they can do more, and we all grow faster.

You personally grow faster, if you have an interest in the business and the industry, an interest in your teams, an interest to contribute, you will really make a big difference and be a cogwheel in the big engine of business that drives the whole thing. When one is frustrated, you so often slow down the whole machine, and then they are obviously going to pay you less. If you speed up the whole machine they are going to pay you more. How do you do that? Understand your role, understand where you fit, find the best fit for you and always keep the client in mind. At the end of the day, the people we deliver the service to finally must come shopping. They pay for what they buy from us. If we can produce better at a lower cost, it works for management, it works for the shareholders, and it obviously then works for us. It’s very important to understand your role as a cogwheel in the big business so we can all grow. There’s much more on this on the website.

We find that many people just look for a job and in a job you get easily frustrated, whereas if you go to work for the company, you go to produce, you go to add value to clients, stakeholders, everywhere around you, everybody loves you and the frustration often just vanish and you will get that fantastic increase, as I hope you will get. The challenge then is to move from the perceived boxes where they frustrate me, where the company decides etc. It’s like a glass plate, you can see on the other side but you can’t touch it. We want to break that glass plate, to think outside the box and move to the great space, where your earnings grow and you get the job you really want and build the career you really want.

Slide 4 (Know what you currently do for whom)

When we all work, invest and benefit together we don’t need permission to do that. We can simply go and do it following these techniques: know what you currently do for whom. On the website I give you a note to show you the value of what you do, the understanding, the insight, you discuss it with people close to you and you ask what more can I do, what else can I do? What must I delegate, what must I do less of? Jack Welsh from GE said NO is the most profitable word in business. NO is also the most profitable word in your career and your job, provided you know what you do, people around you know what you do, you can easily say no and choose what else to do to grow yourself.

Slide 5 (Prepare to communicate to influencers)

From thinking outside the box to the great space, the second step is to prepare to communicate with the people you want to work with, that you need to work with. People must know what you do so they can pay you properly, they can’t pay you properly if they don’t know, so you must prepare so you can communicate. You can’t go and ask them, you have to go to them with solutions, you must have already tested it and be prepared, have your story prepared. You will see elsewhere on the website there’s much more on stories. Your story must be clear.

Here are some selected notes to get you going. Discuss with selected friends, family and colleagues. Prepare and get more information, do some research; ask people who do a similar job in another company, etc. Join associations; join magazines en ezines etc. In this way you become part of the company and part of the industry. Practice those communications so you are prepared for the third step.

Slide 6 (Engage and communicate your work list)

Now you engage the people that can make a difference around you, people that you can delegate to, people that you can get work from and people that need to know to pay you properly. In this process frustrations just go away because you are a task-driven person, you are clear, and when somebody frustrates you, you can simply ask them: “What are we achieving here?” “Let’s rather go for the results so we can earn more money.” You ask and you share, you need good questioning skills that you can find on the website. Respect and acknowledgement will get you a long way. If you go to people around you, below, next to you or above you, you find something you can say to: “Wow, this is great!” They immediately feel bigger. They will immediately want to be with you and frustrations just disappear.

Slide 7 (FEAR & FAIL & RISK)

Let’s look at moving from where people frustrate you to turning that energy into great production, instead of turning it into a negative situation. We all fear, and fear just stands for False Evidence Appearing Real. Fail stands for First Attempt in Learning. If you look back at your life, you learnt to walk and talk, you learnt to tie your shoes, you learnt to ride a bicycle; anything included some failure and some skin. But we got back on the bicycle, it wasn’t a big deal, but when it gets to people, we are scared what they will think. This process will let you practice so you recognize the false evidence and it goes away, the fear of failure goes away, and you start moving forward. The process, to remind you: know what you do, prepare and engage.

You have a fantastic store of assets, everybody has. People have experiences, expertise, interests, aptitudes and relationships that they never articulate, they never unpack it. Talk to people around you, they can see what you can’t see yourself. During my life when I was building businesses, recruiting people, coaching people and doing pro bono work in schools, I haven’t even found a professor that can do his own list. Talk to others around you, if you experience difficulties, come to the website and ask us questions, we can help you. You will see that the resources, whatever resources you may need, are already out there. Your challenge is to bring those resources inside as you climb up the staircase and make your own staircase. Climbing and making a staircase at the same time could be challenging, that is why we have created this safe process from our experience over the years with our friends and professors.

To start: explore and identify. Prepare, engage, and in the process you grow and clarify your store, and you are clearer on what you say yes and no to. Remember no is the most profitable word ever. In this process you are guided to align the job, company and industry that you want to work in. You want to play in the middle, growing your job and growing your company as part of a growth industry. Secondly, you want to make sure that your job aligns with the work you want to do and the work with the job and both of those helps you grow your career long term. You focus in the middle with your asset list and grow. You end up being completely in charge of your future. You don’t have to ask, because you already know what others think and value. Your career aims are aligned with your work, job, company and industry. This insight and knowledge gives you confidence and it puts you in absolute charge.

Slide 8 (Start with the purpose)

We follow a process that let you clarify your purpose in your career. From purpose you can go to objectives and tasks, and dynamically align with your mission and vision. This is a very dynamic change, industry change, company change, your needs change, especially in midlife when you get impatient quicker, you don’t suffer fools so easily anymore. In that process, the more clarity you have, the more people want to be around you. It’s a lot of fun when there is clarity in communication around you.

Slide 9 (Earn more now thinking discussion)

Another model you will learn about in the process is to clearly understand the company’s rules, every way, strategy, focus, clients, what excites them etc. The rules are known and they can’t be changed easily, obey the rules while you work to change them. This is the space you want to spend more time in, provided you don’t waste time on being frustrated about the rules, because often that causes the frustration. Understand and accept the rules, then you can play in understanding and testing for outcomes: the best outcomes for you, the best outcomes for all the stakeholders as we have mentioned in the business model and especially the best outcome for the client.

When you focus on the client nobody can differ from you, because he’s the client, he comes shopping, he’s the only one that pays. You are also going to move in an area where it’s unknown to you but you have influence, then you go and explore. That is why you get more information, talk to more people. This is what all these models help you grow in inter and intra, with clear aims for the next phase of your career after midlife.  It is so easy to not do this and get stuck in midlife with growing frustrations. Remember we want to turn frustrations into benefits.

Slide 10 (Approach people for input and advice. You gain awareness)

Approach people for input and advice and you will gain awareness. A brief review, how would you do this? Your approach should be: I admire something about you. There’s always something you can find, just look past the very frustrating interface, you will find something nice, even if you just thank him for frustrating you in the extreme. We had cases like that, where Nadine was very angry at some people, she thanked them for the opportunity to grow with them, they then turned around and gave her such valuable stuff that her salary increased over 20% in six months. They pointed out what she does that is valuable that she didn’t even know. Communicating that to the right people resulted in her getting a tremendous increase six months later. Recently, during a time when the company gave no increases, they realized they had to compete for her in the industry and she still got her increase.

Turning frustrations into benefits work, if you want to see Nadine’s story, it is on our sister website: ebio. You can just click on Nadine. You have to have serious questioning skills where you ask what else? What more? So you can explore. Your questions can be specific or your questions can be what do you think? There are closed questions and open questions. It’s all on the website and it’s all easy to use. Who else can you recommend I talk to? It’s amazing who people will introduce you to if you just ask. That is an easy way to turn your frustrations into benefits. Closed questions have to be specific. Exploratory questions consist of what else, who else, where else and so forth. There is much more about that on the website. Some of the processes on the web fit exactly what we have given you here. Look at the model SMARTM: Specific, Measurable, Accountable, Reward and Resource, Timing, Monitor, how do you do this? In any work environment all this can be obtained by giving other people benefit or opting them to help you. The processes are on the website.

Careerdevelopmentplan.net website

Let’s look at Planning and Performance. All of the resources are listed here that help you with goal setting, planning and communicating. It is grouped into an easy source for you to navigate.

Resource website

The resource website has a whole lot more resources. There are career success processes, understanding, business processes, career change, development plan; all of these are applicable to midlife career growth and change. A whole number of them, like the interpersonal skills, can turn frustrations into big benefits.

Slide 11 (Supporting the foolproof Career Maker System)

We have the business tool-set and the personal tool set that you’ve just seen on the website. Watch out for your next Career Maker System email!

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hate my job

Do you currently hate your job?

Are you seriously considering a job change in the very near future?

Let career coach, Unre Visagie show you how to manage your current situation to your greatest benefit!

Scroll down for the video.

We are here today to look at careerdevelopmentplan.net, the Career Maker system that assists people to move from perceived career boxes all the way to great careers as we will see in the next ten minutes. We’re specifically here today to look at your career direction and possible job change; you’ve had enough of the job and the way it works at the moment, we have agreed that something must change, and soon.

Typically what creates this perception of a career box are all kinds of fears from which follow many perceived risks. There are the fears of failure and the fears of change looming large for most!. If we just look at fear itself, it is simply false evidence appearing real, it’s rarely got substance to it, and even if it’s got substance, it can be managed. These perceived fears are the well spring of perceived risks and therefore risks are not real. Of course there are the fears of failure. In this situation we are just going to look at failure as a first attempt in learning. You have learnt this way all your life, from walking and talking to everything you can do today, it all went through a process of trial and error until you succeeded. It’s like learning to ride a bicycle; all we’re doing is holding the bicycle a little bit during this process of change. Safe bicycle riding; you shouldn’t lose any skin.

There are three situations we would like to look at:

  1. People can sometimes just change their job in the company, or even just change the way they approach the job.
  2. Some of you may be in a situation where they need to change the job and the company.
  3. Sometimes we find, and some of you may have today, where you want to change the job, the company and the industry you are currently working in.

Now where do we change from and what are we changing to?

We begin with the store each one of us here has; a store of assets. We can typically look at those assets as experience, expertise, industries, aptitudes and relationships. Those are things you’ve accumulated and we find that very few people can articulate these experiences into identifying which job it will fit, which company it will fit, which industry it will fit. Therefore we start by looking at the external world, where all the resources are available that you could possibly imagine. There must just be a process for you where you can take these resources and internalize it, we will show you here. To achieve this process view it like a staircase. Each of you is going to make your own staircase. You’re going to then climb you own staircase, hence the perceptions of big risks.

That is what we have learned from the people in our companies, that we have coached since to professional master coach; that this scary process, once it becomes known, all fear, all risks disappear. Career Maker system makes it clear and real and straightforward. Let’s get started by exploring your exact needs today. We typically like everybody to go through a review, even if you know you want to change your job. You may be any of the three situations. It’s still very good at this time to just do a proper exploration, re-check each element, and by checking it you grow anyway.

The second step is to use this information you’ve accumulated and state clearly why and what you choose each item of information. You typically discuss it with some people around you. It’s all part of your preparation. Then you go to respected people; I know each of you have respected people that you admire. With a clear plan you’ll be able to approach them. They are then the people you want to engage to take you on your next level, job, career direction, the company and the industry. Also the work you choose on a daily basis. This process grows your store.

You already grow in your various assets, you become more visible, and more people know that you are ready for this new thing. By the end of it you align your job with the industry and the company clearly. You can tell anybody that asks very quickly: “I like this company because…” “I like this industry because…”  “I like this job because…” You’ve got to be very clear. It’s just like selling a product; in this case, you are the product. You’ve got to be clear, or they can’t help you. If you are clear everybody wants to help you.

Secondly you do the same process in your current job, you are clear about the work you like and this process is to align your work, do less of some, and do more of others. You will see the process in the next inbox. You aligned that within your job, so you moved your job a bit. Most jobs today are portfolio jobs, I realize all of you do things outside your job definition and some things in the job definition are done by others. That is how the concept of the portfolio job came about, that everybody talks about today. With this alignment and clarity of your process, you now have a clear career aim, you can even call it a career beacon, and you can put the beacon anywhere, and you can see it and other people can see it and you can aim directly for it. You end up in charge of your future.

Never again will you be worried that you can lose your job. Losing your job is almost an exciting thing. You will never be scared again that you will not be paid for what you do, because you will learn how to ask for what is due to you. It’s all part of the process in the next inbox.

You end up with clear insight, knowledge and confidence. The confidence comes from being able to say who am I, what is the job, what is the industry, what is the company, where’s my career going, what tasks do I like doing. This clarity you can call a man with a plan. A man with a plan we found is welcome everywhere. Prof. Kroon couldn’t get holiday jobs for his students six years ago. Today 700 of his students get holiday jobs using the process. All Prof. Kroon does is; he helps the students become clear about the company, the industry, the job, which they approach with clarity, and all of them get their own internship or holiday job, which is part of the curriculum; they must gain experience.

You can’t fail to get the job you want and hopefully you will never in your life use the words again: “I had enough of my job.” You will know how to move from that box, because we see it as a box, all the way through to this great process. We find that people walking the road with us typically get 30 – 40% increases in the next 18 months to 2 years. Several of our people in the program during the last few years got between 20 and 30%, even recently when the company gave no increases, they laid some people off; the people who knew where they were going still got their 30% increase. It’s quite amazing.

It is now as near full-proof as we can get it. Let’s look at where we go from here. Moving from the career box to the great space, with your great asset list, never again using the words: “My job sucks.” Because you will be in charge, you will choose the job you like, how can such a job suck? Change then becomes the excitement it should be with the Career Maker System, the clarity of steps, the ease of execution, the assistance, makes it very straightforward. The next step towards your midlife career change to a job that doesn’t suck will be in your inbox tomorrow. I hope you watch out for it and you are with us forward.

Learn the skills to effectively manage a business or team meeting for greater results!

It is all about the meeting’s purpose and outcomes

With out the clarity you should simply say no! Learn how to say by signing up for the Career Maker system on this site.

Manage business meetings with purpose and outcomes.

Business meetings need clarity, outcomes and purpose - else say NO!

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How to manage a business or team meeting

  1. Plan the meeting
  2. Talk about and listen
  3. Proud of session
  4. Vision and mission
  5. Action road forward and direction
  6. Further engagement
  7. Techniques to increase value flow
how to manage a meeting

How to manage a meeting

Plan the meeting

  • Keep the time and logistics in mind. Structure the meeting and keep the process of organizing in line to achieve the desired outcome / outcomes.
  • Choose a congenial place and time for all individuals involved in the meeting.
  • Who can contribute to the meeting with the best benefit and fit for the specific scenario and goal of the meeting? If you wish to take another person with to the meeting, decide on someone that will fit and cause stacking. Stacking means there is more than one direct benefit to more than one individual or entity involved.
  • Clarify the objective: what do all those involved hope to get out the meeting? Ensure that the expectations of all those involved are shared and calibrated with one another.

How to talk about & listen during the meeting

  • Listen in a structured manner
  • Share in a structured manner

Use the Carnegie method of opening or re-starting a conversation when you get stuck during the meeting:

  • In your mind walk down the street in which the person you are conversing with lives, see the brass plate next to the front door: ask questions about where the individual lives or where they lived.
  • Now walk into the house in your mind’s eye: talk about and ask about what you see on the walls, like photographs, pictures, paintings, ornaments and so on.
  • On top of the house, there is an airplane: where has this person traveled or where do they wish to travel.
  • On top of the airplane is a hobbyhorse: what type of hobbies do they practice and what other interests do they have.
  • On top of the plane, on top of the hobbyhorse sits grandma knitting: where does his/her family come from and what are they engaged in.
  • Identify the feelings, positive or negative, driving the other individuals in the meeting.
  • Positive and negative feelings
    • We are driven by what we desire.
    • This desire is driven as much by positive feelings as it is driven by what we do not want.
    • Humans appear to be more capable of stating what they do not want than what they do want. We seem to struggle with stating our observations about these negative feelings, the things we do not want.
  • The Issue is
    • Continually ask yourself: “It will be right when?”. Use The Issue Is model to assist in creating clarity.
    • Part of sharing in a structured manner is to be able to lead the other individuals on discovering when something will be right.
    • Statements like “The real issue is…” and “When will this be right…?” is typical of this type of conversation.
  • Rapport and Reflection
    • Build rapport by using encouraging body language and activator statements.
    • Reflect and mirror the other person’s statements to ensure you understand what is being said or asked. For example if someone makes a statement like: “You must remember to complete the letter.” You would then mirror that statement ensuring you understood the other person: “You would like me to complete the letter to John as we discussed previously, would you like me to mail it as well or do you want to read it first?.” This ensures there are no misunderstandings and possible challenging situations.
    • Allow the other person to complete what they want to say. Build rapport by using statements like, “Tell me more”, “Wow really!?”, “Is it really like that?”, “They do that?” etc.
  • Open or re-start a conversation using the Carnegie model above (see the book by Dale Carnegie: Winning friends and Influencing people for more resources).
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  • There is basic “stuff” any person on earth feel comfortable talking about. This includes subjects like family, hobbies, travel, interest, art, music and many more such subjects. When a conversation comes to a place where the other person or people are low on energy, in other words they are struggling to communicate with you, use the Carnegie method to re-start the conversation. This process can also be used to start a conversation.

What are the other person/people proud of?

Make the other person feel important

  • What are the other person/people proud of in home, career, business and relations?
  • What does he/she believe in?
  • Religious statements are taboo. When treading in the realm of personal belief, leave the other person to talk, you just listen without reacting. Be aware of making controversial statements or attacking the others’ statements. Use these methods to get the most out of a meeting; do not allow emotional reactions to sabotage the purpose of the meeting.
  • Where does the other spend most of their time?
  • What is on their minds? Things, places and people they have on their minds the most. Such information can be helpful in framing a meeting. Be really interested without probing.

Structure the vision & mission during a meeting

Structure and frame the exploration of the meeting

  • Keep the identified goal in mind
  • What are the other people about?
  • Where are they going in life?
  • What do they wish to achieve?
  • What are their dreams and aspirations?
  • When engaging in a vision / mission type conversations remember and share stories where applicable. It could make for very interesting conversation. Be careful to never attack another person’s beliefs. Some examples include:
  • Gandhi was about dignity and he ended with freedom.
    • Gandhi wanted dignity for his people. He achieved freedom; do the people now have dignity?
  • Madiba was also about dignity and we now have democracy.
    • Madiba also wanted the people to have dignity in being productive. The people now have the vote. Does having the vote bring about dignity?
  • Kennedy caused the USA to believe they are a super race, which caused Vietnam.
    • Kennedy made America invincible by putting the first man on the moon. America believed they could not lose in Vietnam.
  • These are strong examples to use, but if you do not understand the purpose of a meeting, the outcome for your company, project or personally might be the same!

Action road forward and direction

Ask and answer questions like:

Where will you be?

What will you do?

For whom will you do it?

What will the result be?

  • What is the direction we want to go according to the information gathered from the meeting? What alternatives do we have? Develop alternatives using methods like “Asking questions”, “Strawmen” and Edward de Bono’s PO “.
  • Ask questions like:
    • “What else?”
    • “Together with?”
  • Strawmen:
    • One can create it and then burn it, no emotions or structure attached to it. Facilitate out of the box thinking.
    • One is able to develop new ideas without having to defend; there is nothing to defend because it is a Strawmen.
  • Edward de Bono’sPO:
    • Edward de Bono’s PO works in the same manner. One asks the question: “What is PO?” PO is nothing; it can thus be anything one wants it to be. It belongs to nobody and means nothing so PO can be anything you want it to be; again without having to defend it.
  • Orders first or missionary
    • If the project must have orders to sustain it then how does one go about getting orders?
    • If the project is missionary, it is an organization or individuals personal passion, who provides the resources?
  • Are the Seven risks of businesscovered?
    • Seven risks of business, which applies to any project as well.
    • Cover each of the risk areas with co-opted STORRGIES, in other words – obtain external resources that will cover the gaps identified in the project.

Further engagement

  • Conclude and agree who does what, where, when and why?
  • Determine if Venn diagram overlaps exist or not.
  • Venn diagrams
    • A Venn diagram gives a graphic representation of the different stakeholders involved in the possible project. There where the overlap between the areas exists is where you can test the possibility of further engagement and value-add.
  • Have clear next actions .
  • What is the time and place for what needs to happen next?
  • What other people must be involved?
  • Which resource needs to be added or identified?
  • What is the desired outcome of further engagement or of the actions decided upon in the meeting?

Techniques to increase value flow

Each technique you make yours will serve you for life.

  • Continuously add value using these techniques.
  • Grow and diversify communication skills .
  • Mature listening skills
  • Practiced questioning skills

Use and learn old techniques like “Feel Felt Found” to associate with and learn from.

What is meant by delegation?
Why delegation is important
Every person has unique and valuable qualities that are for the benefit of the world. When we entrust responsibly we allow those qualities to flourish.
Our team’s capacity and abilities expand as we increase each other’s skills and experience.
Stephen Covey (7 Habits of Highly Effective people) says, “Trust is the highest form of motivation.” Delegation entrusts people with tasks deemed important – this can motivate and energize your team.
Why we do not entrust others with our work
“It would be quicker to do it myself” – short term view
“I don’t have anyone I can trust to delegate it to” – short term view: training required
“I can do it better myself” – perfectionist view
“If that’s what I am told to do that’s what I do.” – abdicating
“I don’t know how to delegate.” – abdicating: personal training required
When to delegate
When your diary is full (i.e. at least 60% scheduled) of right actions.
Organize your diary by asking key questions:
What am I doing now that doesn’t’t need to be done at all?
What am I doing that could be done by someone else?
What am I doing now that only I can do?
What to hand over
We keep what we are passionate about and what only we can do.
Who would gain the most if they were given responsibility
Someone who can grow and is available.
Someone who is competent, whose job it is and who has time or must make time.
Someone who you want to learn from – exchange in value exchange transaction.
How to delegate to someone you want to train
Situational Coaching
Process relative to task and relationship. Delegation therefore involves balancing directive and supportive functions.
The process of delegation begins with DIRECTING.
The person to whom the task has been entrusted with has low competence but is highly motivated to learn and grow from the experience as it increases their skills and responsibility in the company.
Directing involves close accompaniment with the delegatee, being specific about expectations, identifying measurable outcomes, clarifying understanding.
The next step involves COACHING.
At this stage the delegatee has some competence and some confidence but still needs some directing and some support. The process will involve asking questions, getting feedback and offering guidance.
The next stage involves SUPPORTING.
The individual has reached the stage of greater competence and is on the whole managing the task well. There may however be some lack of confidence when it comes to unexpected situations and new information. The person may make mistakes, need reassurance, and require problem solving skills. The delegating role will be supportive by listening and encouraging and giving specific and helpful feedback.
The final stage is that of actually DELEGATING.
At this stage the delegatee is not only competent but confident. They are managing the task well on a day to day basis with only the occasional monitoring.
Reflective coaching
As delegation moves through this process the task of the delegator is to guide the growth of the delegatee’s self concept through goal-directed behavior. This involves the following:
Setting mutually agreed goals starting with something relatively simple and as progress moving towards more complex goals.
As each goal is achieved reflecting on the process that led to this achievement. I t also asks where the gaps are in achieving the next goal and how these gaps are going to be bridged.
The reflection process will involve honest self-analysis and self-evaluation.
Through achieving goals and reflecting on the process the delegatee grows in their concept of self.
Keep the monkey on their back
Don’t take the entrusted tasks back.
Don’t rescue them.
Turn issues back to them by asking: “What are you going to do?”
Ask questions like: “What do you suggest?”
“What are the feasible alternatives?”
Case studies
Barry du Plessis’s experience with delegation
Leigh Harrison – “My failure to delegate”

What is meant by delegation?

w&t_question

I Ask

Please explain to me why delegation is important?

w&t_exclamation

I Answer

Every person has unique and valuable qualities that are for the benefit of the world. When we entrust responsibly we allow those qualities to flourish.

Our team’s capacity and abilities expand as we increase each other’s skills and experience.

Stephen Covey (7 Habits of Highly Effective people) says, “Trust is the highest form of motivation.” Delegation entrusts people with tasks deemed important – this can motivate and energize your team.

Why we do not entrust others with our work

  • “It would be quicker to do it myself.” – short term view
  • “I don’t have anyone I can trust to delegate it to.” – short term view: training required
  • “I can do it better myself.” – perfectionist view
  • “If that’s what I am told to do that’s what I’ll do.” – abdicating
  • “I don’t know how to delegate.” – abdicating: personal training required

When to delegate

  • When your diary is full (i.e. at least 60% scheduled) of right actions.
  • Organize your diary by asking key questions:
    • What am I doing now that doesn’t need to be done at all?
    • What am I doing that could be done by someone else?
    • What am I doing now that only I can do?

What to hand over

  • We keep what we are passionate about and what only we can do.

Who would gain the most if they were given responsibility

  • Someone who can grow and is available.
  • Someone who is competent, whose job it is and who has time or must make time.
  • Someone who you want to learn from – exchange in value exchange transaction.

How to delegate to someone you want to train

Situational Coaching

Process relative to task and relationship. Delegation therefore involves balancing directive and supportive functions.

  • The process of delegation begins with DIRECTING.

The person to whom the task has been entrusted with has low competence but is highly motivated to learn and grow from the experience as it increases their skills and responsibility in the company.

Directing involves close accompaniment with the delegatee, being specific about expectations, identifying measurable outcomes, clarifying understanding.

At this stage the delegatee has some competence and some confidence but still needs some directing and some support. The process will involve asking questions, getting feedback and offering guidance.

  • The next stage involves SUPPORTING.

The individual has reached the stage of greater competence and is on the whole managing the task well. There may however be some lack of confidence when it comes to unexpected situations and new information. The person may make mistakes, need reassurance, and require problem solving skills. The delegating role will be supportive by listening and encouraging and giving specific and helpful feedback.

  • The final stage is that of actually DELEGATING.

At this stage the delegatee is not only competent but confident. They are managing the task well on a day to day basis with only the occasional monitoring.

Reflective coaching

As delegation moves through this process the task of the delegator is to guide the growth of the delegatee’s self concept through goal-directed behavior. This involves the following:

  1. Setting mutually agreed upon goals starting with something relatively simple and progressing to more complex goals.
  2. Reflect on the process that led to the achievement as each goal is completed. This leads to reflection on where the gaps are in achieving the next goal and how these gaps are going to be bridged.
  3. The reflection process will involve honest self-analysis and self-evaluation.
  4. Through achieving goals and reflecting on the process the delegatee grows in their concept of self.
w&t_elephant

I Explain

Keep the monkey on their back

Don’t take the entrusted tasks back.

Don’t rescue them.

Turn issues back to them by asking: “What are you going to do?”

Ask questions like: “What do you suggest?”

“What are the feasible alternatives?”

Case studies

Barry du Plessis’s experience with delegation

Leigh Harrison – “My failure to delegate”

Goal setting is critical, use the SMART M process to assist

w&t_question

I Ask

Someone asked me whether I have SMARTM goals. When I said, “Yes. I want to drive a big car,” he looked disgusted and walked away. Did I say something wrong?

w&t_exclamation

I Answer

Let me explain it to you:

A goal is an end to which you direct some specific effort in order to satisfy an unfulfilled need.

To be successful, a goal must be:

  • Specific in scope, actions, resources, alternatives.
  • Measurable in results and consumption of resources.
  • Achievable in results for participants.
  • Rewarding to participants, beneficiaries and suppliers of resources.
  • Time taken and end dates.
  • Monitor and communicate actions with action plans.

When we talk of SMARTM goals we actually refer to an acronym that provides an easy recipe for ensuring that our goals comply with the above criteria.

Specific

  • You should be able to define your goals in manageable chunks.

Measurable

  • How will I know? (See? Hear? Feel?)
  • What are the observable results?

Achievable

  • Is this within the participants’ control?
  • Does the participant have the skills, the resources and the authority?
  • Am I committed to follow through?
  • Did I communicate the plans and priorities to those around me and did they agree?

Rewarding

  • The benefit must be greater than the consumption of resources. Lack of clarity causes procrastination.

Timing

  • Get clarity and commitment on deadlines and diary time.
  • How long will it take?

Monitor

  • What are the mileposts so that I can have external monitoring that I am on track?
w&t_question

I Ask

Which processes I can apply to ensure that my goals are achieved?

w&t_binoculars

I Explain

This 6-point action plan facilitates the setting of achievable goals by asking the following questions:

  • Can we commit and get the resources?
  • Can we see a successful implementation?
  • Is the scope and plan communicated and organized so that all participants know what to do?

What is to be done?

When is it to be done?

What is the due date?

Where is it to be done?

Who is to do it?

How do we monitor?

w&t_elephant

I Advise

When a person reaches a goal, we have a “Victory Session” and celebrate. Victories celebrated give energy to keep us fuels us for the next goal.

How to give feedback, bridging the feedback gap

w&t_question

Ask

For some reason I have a feedback gap. Ìt always makes me nervous. When I receive feedback, I often withdraw and go into the poor me – mode. When I give feedback, I’m always afraid that people will take it as criticism. How should I bridge this feedback gap?

giving feedback to peers

Answer

Feedback is essential for growth. The most important thing about it is that it should always lead to something constructive, only then can it really act as a motivational tool for growth.

Feedback consists not only of getting feedback, but also of giving feedback. The glue that bonds these two dimensions together, is the development of an action plan to deal with the content of the feedback. It is essential that action follows feedback, otherwise no growth will result.

giving receiving feedback

Ask

When is feedback positive and when is it negative?

Can you give me some guidelines that will enable me to be more effective in giving feedback?

how to give effective feedback to your students

Answer

One can close the feedback gap and enhance feedback by:

  • Focusing on what you say, how you say it and when you say it,
  • Distinguishing between negative and positive feedback, and by
  • Ensuring that your feedback results in a SMART(M) action plan

The SMART(M) action plan and closing the feedback gap

S Specific: You should be able to break your goals into manageable chunks.
M Measurable: How will I know? (See? Hear? Feel?) What is the evidence procedure?
A Achievable: Is this within my control? Do have I the skills, the resources, the authority? Do I give myself permission to act?
R Rewarding: The benefit must be greater than the cost, otherwise you won’t achieve the goal (causes procrastination).
T Timing: When do I start? How long will it take? What are the mileposts so that I can monitor that I am on my way?
M Monitor: We added a last M for monitor. We found that one can have the most amazing plan, but without monitoring and tracking it until completion; the chances for successfully completing this plan is minimal.

Feedback should always result in something constructive and actionable. When you are about to give feedback and are afraid that it might be destructive in a way, rather apply the 24 hour rule.

Sometimes the need to give feedback was caused by something that triggered emotions; these emotions can interfere with giving constructive feedback. If this is the case allow at least 24 hours to pass before giving feedback. The 24 hour rule allows these possibly interfering emotions to play themselves out before giving feedback. This is sometimes difficult to do, but once you have done this a few times the feedback gap will be significantly reduced!

how to give constructive feedback

Constructive Feedback

Developing a SMART(M) action plan

  • What is to be done?
  • Who is to do it?
  • When is to do?
  • How do we monitor?

Close the feedback gap by giving

  • Descriptive feedback
  • Specific feedback
  • Constructive feedback
  • Timeous feedback
Negative feedback Positive feedback
Should always be in private. Praise in public as person and others benefit as well.

Focus on the problem:

  • What was the behavior
  • What was done
  • What’s was said

And not on the person.

Focus on the person:You did a great job!

Put into context – Period of time.

People are then more ready to accept.

Make permanent by using:You “always” produce good results.
You” never” let us down.
Make specific – Resolved Copy (great)
how to give performance feedback

Advise

Remember that feedback should always be constructive.

Never cause pain, other than as a signal to learn something new or to do something differently.

how to give good feedback

Ask

Receiving feedback is an even worse nightmare! I often feel that everyone else is trying to burst my bubble… What can I do to change this mind set and close this feedback gap I have even more?

giving feedback to your boss

Explain

Always give constructive feedback, be aware and bridge the feedback gap!

There are two different sets of tools that will enable you to deal effectively with the feedback you receive:

  • Using open-ended questions to explore exactly what is expected of you. Read the questioning skills applet.
  • Using NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) techniques like reframing and dissociation to see yourself inside the picture.

It is natural to feel attacked when one is at the receiving end of critical feedback (poor me); however, reacting in a defensive or attacking manner curtails the feedback, stops the growth process and stretches the feedback gap even more.

A person coming from the personal power model (maturity), who receives unpleasant feedback controls his natural feelings of defensiveness and gets more information by using the following technique:

negative positive feedback

Negative Positive Feedback

  • TELL me more.
    • Use Open-Ended questions: What, when, where, who, how to determine an Action Plan.
  • WHAT is to be done?
    • (Now/Next time/In future)
  • WHO is to do it?
    • (Who is to be responsible? What other resources are needed?)
  • WHEN is it to be done?
    • (When is it to be started? How long will it take?)
  • WHERE is to be done?
    • (What area, location etc.)
  • HOW do we monitor it?
    • (How will I know your plan is working? Who does the checking?)
  • Reframing
    • What else (that would be to my benefit) could this mean – this method is commonly known as Lateral Thinking.
  • Dissociation
    • When feedback is hurtful, I can dissociate from the feelings in order to effectively manage the feedback to find a solution.
giving feedback exercises

Advise

Deal with feedback in an emotionally intelligent way. While you’re at it why not also use the six thinking hats to enhance communication and understanding.

The first few times you are going to react like you always did. Make a conscious effort to be aware when giving or receiving feedback; focus on what to do, what to say and how to react for all to get maximum benefit from the feedback.

Handling feedback in a mutually beneficial way will eventually come naturally. Use the support of those around you and make them aware of how you are developing certain skills. Others will then learn from you and everybody grows and develops new skills!